thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Holy sore nipples Batman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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