He asked me if I "almost moaned"
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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