i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
