Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
they need to just BURY HIM!
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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