and you said cock pushups were impossible
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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