It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
