I looked at my own cervix.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
my poor anus
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
