Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
