Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Shame - the story of my life.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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