It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
