Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
