I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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