It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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