I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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