he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize