eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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