That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
