I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
