I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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