Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
