I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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