Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
