I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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