Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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