no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
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