Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
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it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
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She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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