do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
