didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
