I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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