In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
tell me about the eggs
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