One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Panties = found
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
