Taylor Swift is so right about you.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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