I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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