fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
