May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
