last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
