don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
