Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
do herpes really smell.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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