Don't make out with my wife yet
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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