even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
