Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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