Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
