yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
