it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize