Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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