so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Randomize
