why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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