She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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