what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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