you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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