no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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